The Sacred Place Within Us All

"Within us all is that place in which we are
Forever Unborn
Forever Unceasing
Forever Sane
Forever Wholesome
Forever in Unconditional Cherishment of all living things"

I have been silent recently. I thought that I didn't write because I couldn't find the time but the truth was that I had nothing to say. I have been overwhelmed with a new position that is full-time plus and concerns with the health of my brother, Harry. He is a resident at Heather Knoll (the nursing home where I have worked for over 8 years). He has lived there for over 3 years and been quite independent. He required little care and my parents came daily to visit and bathe and spend time with him. He had a routine that included daily rounds to various offices to visit with the staff and twice a day he stopped in to visit with me. Harry was born with down syndrome and that frequently leads to alzheimers. Although that is what brought him to Heather Knoll, he has been very stable and done extremely well. That was until a couple of months ago. In the last 2 months his health has taken a nose dive. The rapid decline is surprising even to those of us who have cared for many residents with alzheimers. He is not the same person from one week to the next. In a matter of weeks he has forgotten how to walk and talk and swallow. This is the course of the disease and I have seen many taken by its cruel grip. However, it is not the same when it is your brother...
I recently found a picture of the two of us holding hands in front of the Christmas tree. I was four years old and Harry was eight. I smiled and held out my dress like a princess but Harry has his sweet little head thrown back with an enormous grin that looks like pure joy. I remember that boy that was naive and trusting and didn't notice when the other children made fun of him. He was my grandma's favorite and I was glad. I was strong and confident and had many friends. Harry's world was smaller and I knew that it was difficult for him to watch me learn to drive and date, get married and have a family. There was comfort in knowing that he and my mother have a very special bond. She has called him her other half and anyone that has been around them can see the light of love in each of them as they gaze into each other's eyes. My mother is suffering as she watches her baby boy fading away. It is so painful for me to watch... I feel so utterly helpless. I want to do something to make it better but there is nothing to do. Disease will win this battle and I know that a part of my mother will go with him when he leaves because they are one.

I woke up this morning thinking about the sacred place within us all. Just the other night I went to an Over the Rhine concert and met some very special new friends. As we walked out onto Main Street in downtown Akron, snowflakes were coming down gently and everything had a light dusting of clean white snow. The holiday lights were out and it felt like magic. It seemed so quiet and utterly peaceful to me. My heart swelled with love and peace and joy for this beautiful beautiful world.
As I lay in bed remembering that moment I realized that is what our sacred place is like. Always pure and bright with hope... full of peace and overflowing with love. I thought of my brother and I remembered that his sacred place is forever unceasing, forever sane, forever wholesome, forever in unconditional cherishment of all living things and that truly his Life is with us forever. Amen.